Bleeding Fingers
Do you ever have in impending sense of doom?
I have it often, and I have it right now. It’s 5am, and just like I promised, I have been getting up each morning to blog and to write. The problem with getting up earlier than usual with any intended task beyond a shuffle to the coffee machine is that my brain doesn’t seem to rest properly. It appears that because I haven’t gotten all of my thoughts out of my head before going to bed, they circle and swirl around all night, until I can stand it no more and have to get up.
Unfortunately they don’t just keep to themselves either. Just as I suspected, with my ideas of cells and interconnections yesterday, they weave and thread and tighten themselves into little knots, trying to connect with one another, and making up new patterns where ever they can. So my sleep is fitful and plagued by dreams of exams that I haven’t studied for, and contact lenses that won’t fit into my eyes properly.
I only have a small brain, and despite my claims to the contrary, I can really only concentrate on one thing at a time. That is the reason why people often assume I’m very organised, because to exist in this world I find I have to get one task completed before I can start on another. The passport applications must be handed in before I can start on my CPD hours. CPD must be ticked off before I can do the Christmas shopping. Shopping must be done and wrapped before I can start my BAS. And on and on and on it goes, seemingly forever.
The blog used to be another of those tasks, something to be done to relax and calm my mind of an evening. The 5am Club rescheduled that, and now I am adrift, not really knowing what to do before bedtime, with one part of me (which, as the hours tick over becomes all of me) fiddling away at the topic for the day.
It’s bloody exhausting.
A 5am friend told me to give it a go for a few weeks to get into the swing. She said it will get easier. I hope so, because today I have slightly numb fingers, because I thought it would be a good idea to learn the guitar instead of writing last night. I kind of leant the chords to ‘Hound Dog’ (The first song I could find an easy YouTube on that didn’t contain lots of music words I don’t understand, like tabs and bars.) but of course only I know it’s Hound Dog, the chord changes are too slow for other humans to recognise.
So now I must away, armed with my new understanding of Bryan Adams from “Summer of ’69”. I didn’t play it ’til my fingers bled, but they do feel like they’ve been worn down a bit.
Tell me 5am-ers, how do you turn off your brains?
Can you play guitar? How HARD is it???
…From The Ashers
so maybe just maybe you aren’t meant to be part of the 5am club. Sounds like you are in it kicking and screaming well if you could be bothered at that time to kick and scream lol
Haha! Yes. More like whining and yawning!!
so write in the evenings and just get up-ish at 5ish and zombie around until you function.Who knows maybe in time you will want to write at 5am but you can still be part of the 5am club without having to DO something at that time 😉
As if I would get up if there wasn’t some threat of a deadline. Nice try though problem solving lady.
why did you want to start writing at 5am if you are now trying to fill the before bedtime slot and it calmed your mind. How was it broken so that you came up with this seemingly demented fix?
Oh you know me Chrissy, it sounded like 5am was the new black and I wanted in on it. So now you will all have to HEAR about it forevermore. Jus look out if I go paleo- you’ll never be able to sit in the same room as me again.
Seriously though, I was looking for a way of making some more time to write. And I’m awake-ish at 5 anyway… Seems I might need to blog of an evening though or I’ll never rest properly. (I already stay up too late…)
I taught myself guitar years ago – I took my Student Allowance (the money the Federal Government gave me to attend Uni back in the days of free Uni) and instead of buying text books, I bought a guitar (This might be why we no longer have free tertiary education)
I bought some chord books of my favouriet bands – The Beatles, Pink Floyd, The Who – and taught myself some chords…
Chords are easy – practice for a few weeks, and you’ll be able to play “Breathe” by Pink Floyd like an expert…
Beyond that – scales and riffs and finger-picking – that tales a LOT more practice, but you can get there…
I found the best way to learn how to play was to record my playing, and then play along with my playing… so I’d use your iPad to record and make some music, and you’ll get better and better as you play along with yourself… trust me on this! 🙂
Haha JJ, I like that you call it playing. I’m not sure what it is but the cat doesn’t like it…
I asked the kid, and owner of the guitar. He reckons the tabs are the way to go if I want the songs to sound like the songs….?
He usually does the tabs then changes to the chords for the chorus..?
Who knew it was so involved?
I learnt to play the first few bars of Jingle Bells and promptly gave up. It was way to difficult for me. I have also taken to getting up early to catch up on ye olde interwebs. I find it a bit of a challenge to open my eyes that early, let alone organise my brain or be coherent. I have never mastered the art of turning off my brain, so if you find out how, please let me know. I will be eternally grateful x
I suspect that might be all I do at 5am. Or maybe I will take in some exercise… I suspect the 5am writing is not the answer for me.