Here’s the hits, dooods:

1.  I think I may have shared with you how much I like short term gain.  Especially for very little investment.  And that is why I love House Rules.  No weeks and weeks of waiting to see the “reveal” on this baby.  It’s all over in a week.  House Rules does come with one drawback though:  THE BITCH.  There is always a bitch isn’t there?  And this one is a doozy (yes, I just typed doozy and autocorrect allowed it, even thought it won’t allow fuckstick.. Go figure.)  Anyway, I hate this bitch character with all the beige hatred I can muster at 8pm of an evening when I am safety ensconced on my couch in my comfortable home.  I direct much invective in her direction.  I may have called her a “slut” a little earlier this evening.  I know not why.  Seems a bit extreme now I look back on it.  Oh well.  I’m sure the scriptwriters at Channel 7 would be happy with the level of my emotional investment.

2.  Praise the baby cheeses for haircuts (and hairdressers)!  I have been growing my hair for a while now and it is driving me slowly, but irrevocably insane.  I am follicularly abundant, so there is TOO MUCH HAIR.  I can no longer cope with the equivalent of a normal person’s ponytail shoved behind each ear, as I try to grow it.  So yesterday I went to Jules and said “GET RID OF THIS HORROR”.  She refused because she is a long-hair chick and also bossy and she wants to see it longer.  She did, however deforestate the shit out of it with her thinning scissors.  Oh sweeeet relief.

3.  Sydney Swans vs Geelong.  Greatest winning margin ever against the Cats.  Most  possessions ever in a game.  Well done little Swannies.  I have a soft spot for them, South Melbourne was such a sad little club way back in the Then, and they were so brave to move to a state lousy with rugby, and disdain for the code.  Cheer, cheer the red and the white.

4.  Coco mastered the cartwheel.  I guess I’ve told you before about her tenacity- for a kid who isn’t that strong, and who fatigues easily due to her anaemia, she is full of surprises.  She has been trying to cartwheel for the last month or so.  Often.  In our bedroom.  Hitting the walls with her feet.  Hurting her wrists.  And sounding like she is about to smash through the ceiling when I’m working in the room directly below.  This week, she tamed the ‘wheel, and I granted her her ‘hard surfaces licence’ so she is now allowed to cartwheel on concrete.  So even though I have to hold my breath every time she does a flip, it makes my heart sing.

5.  Coles online shopping.  Do you do it?  Well if you don’t, take my word for it and get on it.  Stop wasting an hour or so every week trudging around the stupid supermarket.  In answer to your questions: yes you can still get the specials, yes the fruit is perfectly fresh, yes they deliver at a specified time, yes you can get it delivered at a time when you are busy working and your husband is home and therefore has to unpack it.  All that and you can get it done during one of the ad breaks of Elementary.  Do it.

So there you have it, the hits of the week.  Have a great weekend, full of hits of your own…

… From The Ashers xx