I haven’t done this one for a while. So let’s do it: the hits (and shits) of the week.

SHIT: I’ve been seeing cockroaches and bright black moths flying around at the periphery of my vision since Coco’s surgery. And although it could be the start of the locusts (2020 ‘eh?) I thought I’d see the Optom. As luck would have it, it’s not anything crazy, just floaters. Lots of ’em. So if you see me snap my head to the right, or look like I’m warding off evil spirits, don’t worry, it’s just a floater. Did I mention I’m scared of all flying things? Good times.

HIT: Sam and I launched our new coaching programme for Chicks Who Click which begins in December. So this means we got to BUY STUFF (yes, there will be presents for our Chicks). Is CWC a business or a chance for Sam and I to have champagne lunches to ‘think of ideas’ and buy nice presents? Paradox: the ability to hold two seemingly opposite ideas to be true at the same time. Winky face.

SHIT: Alldaysupersucker hangover on the weekend from having too many of the aforementioned ideas.

HIT: I finally went to the Leunig site to find a print I’ve been wanting for ages, and came across this cool one. It’s not the one I’m getting, but it’s too good not to share. The hit is that Micheal Leunig is in the world and is unafraid to rouse the rabble and criticism be damned. I think we could all do with a splash of Leunig in our lives. If you want some you can go to http://www.leunig.myshopify.com

SHIT: I found a FAB house that I got really, really obsessed with and wanted to buy, immediately. I then drove to said house and found it was IN THE COUNTRY. The proper country, not Noosa Hinterland pretend country. So I can’t have the dream house (I am not country folk- there were definitely bugs there, and not pretend eye-bugs either), but a small HIT: I found the Noosa (not in Noosa) Botanical Gardens with a grouse ampitheatre looking over Lake Macdonald. I sat there, imagined Titania and Puck running amok, and ate a donut.

HIT: I’m going to Ricky’s for lunch. I’m predicting a hit, so keep an eye out. I won’t tell if it’s shit. (I also know it won’t be. That place rocks). Let me know if you want a blog on it, I fancy myself as a bit of a #foodblogger.

Happy Friday to you all, From The Ashers.

PS Not a sponsored post, but feel free to show me the money, Leunig and Ricky’s and I’ll wax lyrical for sure. #influencer

So, in this weird week of sadness for something that has the feeling of unreality, and happiness for my own good fortune, here are the hits:

1.  Long, lazy days by the pool. It is SO HOT in Queensland right now, every day has the oppressive energy of a storm that wants to launch, so The Ashers are spending much of our time languishing. So much so that Liam has adopted a posture akin to a bodybuilder as he wants to show off his “guns” that have developed from all of the swimming and swinging on the rope catapault (don’t even ask, it is SO dangerous, I can’t even look).  Coco’s blonde hair has taken on a faint green tinge, and me? Well this old skin is like a well aged sultana. On the upside, all this lolling about has lead to me painting the back stairs and supervising the gerni-ing. I have all the good ideas.

2. Pool toys. How good are they? I mentioned in some previous blog the silly things the Evil Geniuses bought for five bucks, but oh how wrong I was. Last week I had a pool full of kids so I gently suggested the first person to do one lap up and back on those ridiculous, tippy things without falling in would earn two dollars. Kept ’em going for at least an hour whilst I caught up on my wrinkling (See 1. above)

3. The elves. This year the elves have struggled a bit to find trinkets to put inside the advent drawers, so they have gone a bit crazy, pulling the tiny drawers out and just shoving things in the general vacinity. This week they pulled out four of them and just kind of leaned a DVD on top, and it happened to be Mr Bean’s Christmas. I made the kids some caramel popcorn and they had an early bath and settled on opposide ends  of the couch (“Don’t touch me”, “No, you don’t touch ME”) to watch it. Watching them get the Mr Bean vibe and laugh, full, proper belly laughs was a balm* to my heart. They watched it three times in a row. It made me happy to see they have the same sense of humour as us- Nathan and I often, errr, bonded over Monty Python, Black Adder and The Young Ones. I’m thinking that I might try and get a copy of The LIfe of Brian tomorrow. Even if they don’t get all the jokes, I reckon the references will serve them well as they negotiate their way through a religious school. (Or not).

Some other friends may have come to the cinema too…

4.  Making a blood deposit (me) and a blood withdrawl (Coco). We are so lucky to live in a country where this is something that is freely available and safe. It never ceases to amaze me how selfless people can be, how generous of their time and energy, for the good of anonymous strangers. Yet again, thankyou blood donors. (Plug: call 13 14 95 to donate!)

5.   A lovely blog reader who also happens to be a friend, dropped this off yesterday!

CHOO CHOO BARS!! Who even knew they were still a thing? I am eating one right now for breakfast (it’s Christmas, right?) They are smaller than I remember, but who cares, I have A WHOLE BOX. And they are just as delicious, and yes, as the package promises, strangely soothing… Coco and I are having a ball showing each other our black tongues. Liam thinks we are “gross”, but he’s clearly 10 going on 28 and an IDIOT… Thanks so much Suze.

And just for the record, if you are thinking of dropping presents around to my joint for no reason, I also like Veuve (Thanks Rose), money, shoes, books, money and Veuve. Feel free to go nuts.

So, in crazy and turbulent week of emotional and actual storms, what have been your hits?

*A rare and valuable balm. (Monty Python)

…From The Ashers

Here are the hits for you… A litle late I know, the 5am club went on strike today. I guess it was all of the WEEK adding up.. It’s been a bit of a rollercoaster.

1.  BLOOD DONORS BLOOD DONORS.

The kid got her top up of the good stuff this week- a little earlier than anticipated, but still in great timing for the festive season. So, I’d like to send out a big thank you and virtual cuddle to all of the wonderful blood donors who give up their precious red stuff for our kid, and kids just like her. Without you we wouldn’t have much of a life, to be honest, and we definitely wouldn’t be able to GO TO THE USA for our Festivus celebrations. THANKYOU ONE AND ALL.

2.  All of my wonderful patients, who, without even a hint of grumbling annoyance, rescheduled their appointments so that we could go ahead with point 1 above. I am so lucky to have such a gorgeous group of lovely, understanding people to work with. Blessed I tells ya!

3.  You lot.

This week I have had such lovely feedback about the blog. I have had people complimenting my writing, telling me they like coming here to visit, sharing with me the things that make them laugh and cry as they sponge up my tales of whinging and general carry on. We might be perched here in a tiny little corner of the internet, but to all of you who come on over and read From The Ashers, thank you. Thanks for reading, commenting, sharing and just generally being part of this community. I love that you bother to stop by.

4.  This book.

I finally have a copy in my hot little hands, and almost want to cry just looking at the cover. It was written by the clever, humble, patient and incredibly persistent Allison Paterson. I’ve only read a tiny bit so far, but I can already tell it’s going to be a cracker. I’m so proud of her for forging ahead with this massive project, creating this important work and giving heart to these pieces of Australian History.

5.  All of the small things.

The delicious crumble of home-made shortbread. The sound of rain on our tin roof at night. The snuffling movements of our children sleeping. The gentle winking of Christmas lights. The joyful noise of children splashing in the pool. The salty fragrance of warm, wet air. The crackling anticipation of the record player. The pungent smell of the first coffee of the day in my hideous Christmas Mug. The delivery of gifts from far away. Colourful paper. Curling ribbon. People who say thank you and mean it. Fresh new haircuts. Juicy Summer fruits. Laughing with friends. Silly Christmas movies. Getting dinner cooked for me. Music. New ideas. Almost sunburnt skin. The calming lull of cricket on the telly. Home-brewed ginger beer. Long days. The whisper of ceiling fans that stir the hairs on my arms. Life.

Small things. But they add up okay. They make a big life.

So what are your hits people? Any big wins this week? (Don’t be shy- we are a community, remember.)

…From The Ashers

Here are the hits of the week:

1. The last day of school. Yay!! How good is the thought of long hot, Summer days stretching out in front of you? Man, I love this time of the year.

These dudes had a great year, finishing on a high.

Liam’s teacher got me aside and asked if I knew that he was “really smart”? Yeah, we kinda guessed after the time when he was almost four and he asked me how a rainbow was made, and after I gave a (might I say) grouse story about rainbow fairies painting the sky, he looked at me, deadpan and said, “Now what is it really?” I explained the Dispersion Effect and he said, “Why didn’t you just tell me that? That is way cooler than some dumb paint fairies.” I guess he has a point.

And Coco? Well she showed us all a thing or two about tenacity. The kid is currently hanging out for blood (we are trying to tough it out for another week or so: Tantrums R Us) and has a haemoglobin of around 65 (For reference: you are probably thrumming along with about 130 or so right now) and she had her swimming carnival this week. She has never swum 25 metres before, but in the carnival she did. Powered along. For about ten metres. Then somehow swam the rest of the lap. Came second last. Had to be lifted out of the pool sobbing with exhaustion like a limp little yellow jellyfish, amidst cheers from the other kids. Eric the Eel, you’ve got nuthin’ on Coco Ricki Asher.

2. Oh yeah. Nath (legend) got me one o’ these babies.

Imma be filling THAT thing out today.. After I gaze at its empty magnificence, full of potential, for a few minutes. Sorting the new calendar is one of my favourite end of year rituals.

3.  Talking of rituals, I started a new one this year. Got us a little jar and some tags, and instructed everyone to jot down things during the year. The jar is called “Cool Stuff that has happened.”

As you can see, the contents are a little meagre. I suspect that I may be the only one with any entries. I intended to open in on New Year’s Eve, but we will be ON HOLIDAYS IN AMERICA then, so I think we might do it in the next week. My plan was to string them up in a sort of garland thingy. Seems it’s gonna be a little shorter than I thought. Hopefully it will be so much fun that the other lazy bastards in this house will be more excited to do it next year. We shall see.

4.  Check out our teacher gifts. Made by me. Okay, not made by me. Paid by me. Made by Sprinkles, which is a better result for everyone concerned I think. It’s always good if the edible gift is, actually edible, I find. They looked so amazing I almost felt like keeping them for myself, just to admire them for a bit longer. If you need something impressive looking for your service providers, or those friends who appreciate the finer things, get yourself over to their Facey account right now.

**Not sponsored, but Clare and Fi HAVE given me free cupcakes before, well they gave them to the children, and I slipped and fell, and they somehow ended up in MY belly.**

5. Christmas STUFF. I’m going to write you a post about some of our Christmas Rituals, coming up soon (I know, we tackle the big issues over here at The Asher’s), but it appears I have come to be known as something of a ‘Christmas Tragic’, a phrase coined by our babysitter. I happily adopt that moniker, and with it comes some perks, one of them being that people now give me Christmas Crap. I cannot tell you how awesome this is! Not only do I get pressies (This week I have ALREADY been given some brain teasing puzzles, mini-fruit cakes and the motherlode of all shortbread) but I also get fantastic STUFF.

Check this out:

IT’S A HANDMADE LAMP. Made by the people who gave it to me. Have you ever seen anything so cute? The kids adore it. Liam, because he appreciates the work that has gone into it, and Coco because it has tiny people and her chubby little fingers can walk up and down the stairs. (Sorry the pic is a bit dark- I wanted to show you it all lit up.)

And from the same people, this:

The top part rotates around and PLAYS A BLOODY TUNE. Perfect for the Grisashers.

I may have mentioned we are GOING TO AMERICA, and we have to wear an Ugly Christmas Sweater. Which don’t exist in Australia, as far as I can tell. So this week another patient gave me the worst jumper ever. I promise I will model it for you shortly.

How SHIT am I gonna look, with my tiny head poking out of the top of this bugger? It’s PERFECT. Yet, how rude: when Suze gave it to me she said, “It’ll be so funny, with your little pinhead. You’ll look like a shit little elf.” So yeah, it’s great that my people treat me with such respect and deference. Nothing like professional boundaries.

So that’s it from me: Your turn now. What have you been Hitting on this week?

…From The Ashers

Here are the hits of the week:

1.  The crafty ladies of Al-Lani’s Angels (they don’t know they are called that- only one of them reads the blog, so I’m claiming the naming rights) who made this motherlode of softies for the Mirabel Foundation. What a bunch of sweethearts they are!! And thanks again to Alisa from Plump for the donation of material. A very kind gesture, which saved me a fortune.

Here’s a small sample of what they made. They have multiplied now, but I won’t post a pic until I have them all in my hot little hands.

…And here’s the one I’m making… Isn’t he, umm, special?
And no, he is NOT a cat. He’s a rabbit people.

2.  Meetings with my goal buddy every Wednesday. We are having such fun dreaming up new ideas and playing with our goals. If you haven’t read the book Life in Half a Second, may I suggest you do, and then join in on the video challenge. It’s so much fun. Who knew? Who even am I?

3.  Seeing how excited the kids were this week preparing for their Christmas Concert. It was called The Christ (x) Factor. Same songs, new format. Sounds like television really. There was even a special appearance by a dude who came third in the real X Factor back when Kyle was on the show. He crooned us a cool Christmas carol. The kids went nuts. (And maybe some of the Mums)  I was too busy rocking in the corner because the canteen had run out of wine.

4.  Getting all the Chrissy shopping done and sent. Thanks to Liquorland, Clare Hammond, Sprinkles and Green B. I couldn’t have done it without you. And talking of Liquorland, do you ever save those shop-a-dockets with the two for one grog deals? I don’t usually, but this week I got the Savvy. It was totally drinkable. I said TWO FOR ONE people. Hop to it.

Not bad for a sundowner on a hot night

5.  Playing hooky with the kids today. It was a late night last night on account of all singing and dancing, and it’s raining today, so I’ve called it: Jammie Day. I have to go downstairs to work for some of it, but mostly today will be about lazing around, writing letters to Santa and reading books I think. The calm before the storm. School holidays start next week, and I for one cannot wait, so today we are having a preview.

Happy weekend to you all. Have fun putting up the tree on Sunday.

Join in and share the love: what are your hits of the week?

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*Not a sponsored post. When o when is some grog or shoe shop going to contact me for sponsorship???

..From The Ashers

1. Vanilla almonds. How good are they? I wanted to show you a pic of the packet, but I ate them all and threw it away. I’ll never be a food blogger, but I can tell you they are in Coles and they are delicious and salty-sweet. Do yourself a favour.

2. Tupperware lunchboxes. Do you have them? They are grouse because they have all of the little compartments so you don’t have to use any Glad Wrap or anything like that, but unfortunately, like all kids things that leave the house without your supervision, they get chucked around. Usually by Term 4 the lid will have cracked a bit. But because they are Tupperware, they replace them for you. For free! We just got two new ones from my local Tuppy lady. Such a good thing. Don’t waste any more money on the stinky other brands: go the Tuppy.

3. Al-Lani’s Angels. A group of unreal ladies, giving up their time during this silly season to make softies for the Mirabel Foundation, to make sure some little kids who are going through some tough times, will have something to cuddle this season. In all of your rushing around this December, in the buying and the organising and the splurging on stuff, it would be really nice if you could think of something that might help out a child who doesn’t have a lot. You know what to do. Perhaps put aside a little time today to set that up. It’s worth the effort.

4. Rain. FINALLY we got some to help us through this heatwave. On the downside, that meant frogs. Croaking. I mean REALLY croaking. In our down pipe. Near my bedroom window. ALL NIGHT.

5. Basking in my own virtuous glow, cos I’ve gotten all my Chirstmas shopping done and wrapped. I love all things Christmassy, but I get a bit antsy if I have too many outstanding tasks at this time of the year, because fun things to do always pop up. Getting it done and dusted is a massive relief. A special thank you (as always) to Sprinkles, the local cupcake and hamper specialists. I always get them to make me up some delicious things that I like to try and palm off as my own (it doesn’t work of course- my reputation precedes me).  All that remains now is to procure some Ugly Christmas Sweaters for our jaunt to America. Anyone in SE Queensland know where I might find such a thing???

I hope you had a fun week too, and have been able to have some time to sit quietly before it all really gets going.

What are your hits? Are you a Christmas shopping nerd like me?

…From The Ashers