There’s softies and there’s SOFTIES
You might recall that I talked about getting a group of people together in what is commonly called a ‘Stitch and Bitch’ session, to make some little soft toys for the Mirabel Foundation this Christmas. Well, ours was called a ‘Sew and Glow’ session by me, the self appointed CEO of bossing everyone around. Lani was a big help (in fact she did most of the work), so I wanted to call our group Al-Lani’s Angels, but someone thought that sounded more like a brothel (which would have been more fun: people, craaaaft??? how do you do it?), so nix to that, and Sew and Glow were are.
I provided the wine and the nibbles and various bits and pieces. I even got to play my own tunes, which was cool- it’s not often that people will sit quietly for any longer than three tracks, listening to the music I inflict on them. (Perhaps I have found my true calling: DJ Shadowcat could become DJ Stitchcat.)
I did not, however, provide any actual expertise.
The ladies cut and stitched and chatted (if they could over my most excellent music selections) and sewed, whilst I poured glasses of wine and tried to look inconspicuous on account of not having a sewing machine, or any intention of doing any of the actual work.
After a time, I thought I was going to end up pretty inebriated if I didn’t do something, so I decided to make up my own thing.
Because that is always a good idea.
Everyone else had patterns and pins and plans.
I (the one with no actual skills) decided I would just make something up on the fly. I will show you it shortly.
But first I will tell you how it all went down this morning.
The Evil Geniuses were keen to see the fruits of our labour (and I use the term “our” very loosely), so I laid all of the toys out for their perusal. They picked up one and then another, admiring their eyes and their softness, affirming their relative cuteness, naming them, and indicating which ones were their favourites.
They did not say anything about mine.
I let them check everything out, and then asked them which one they thought I made. To my shock (feigned) they guessed immediately. I then asked them if mine was their very MOST favourite. Evil Genius One looked at me in horror, eyes wide with the FEAR, wondering if he should lie, or simply forfeit his promised Friday Lunch-Order immediately. “Ummm, well, I don’t really want to say, because it’s not like sewing is your MAIN thing, I mean, you seem to be good at lots of other things…” Evil Genius Two just looked me in the eye and said, “Nup. I don’t like it. It’s small and flat and has wonky eyes, and it’s not even finished, even though you were gone for ages. I like the cat. Or the other cat. Or the twin cats. Or the owl, bunny, babushka, boy babushka, even the taggy, better than that…thing. It’s weird looking.”
Okay then. Brats.
Santa is listening you know.
And I just ate your cupcakes when you weren’t looking, sweethearts, so there.
…From The Ashers