I am a Giraffe, and I’m not happy.

Usually I pride myself on being a know-all, and basically just acting smart-arsey as I swan about in my own little world.  I know as much as I need to, about the things that I’m interested in, and for everything else there’s google.  Or if I’m feeling all old-school and retro; my textbooks.

These days you don’t even have to know the name of the song, or even very much of the song that’s dancing around in your head, to decode it.  You can type in a few of the lyrics, or hum or sing a bit of it to an app, and voila: there it is ready for purchase.  Gone are the days of going into Brashs and quietly singing, out of tune and warbling, to the cute guy with the earring, the first verse of the latest Duran Duran.  (Who really knows what The Reflex are anyway?)

Once I was watching Spicks and Specks and I’d missed the intro, so I was wondering who the funny guy with the big teeth was. Just idly wondering mind, I didn’t really need to know, but I typed in “Who is the guy with the big teeth on Spic…” and the answer was there.  I didn’t even complete the question.  I felt like Tony Barber must have, on the fast-money part of Sale.

So with all this at my behest, most days I get around thinking I’m pretty smart.  According to me.

So you can imagine my surprise last night, when I got a riddle incorrect.  Because, shock of shocks, I used only my brain.

Curses to you, brain.

Immediately after I sent the answer to my FB friend, I googled the answer, feeling all puffed up and superior, only to find, “Computer says NO”.  Of course, every part of my being wanted to avoid the public ridicule, and see if I could change my answer, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.  The only thing I abhor more than being a dummy, is being a public dummy, and the only thing I hate more than that, is being a cheat.  Ever since I cheated on the Rubik’s Cube in 1981, and my Dad just quietly said “That’s disappointing”, I haven’t had the heart for it.

So here I am.

Grumpy and cross and all giraffe-y.

For two more days.



….Fricken Facebook… Mumble mumble…


Have you done the stupid FB riddle?  Are you a giraffe?


Now with added shame