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(The Ghost of) Father’s Day Present…

31/08/2013 by Alison Asher 5 Comments

Coco and Nath

The kids have been jumping all about, getting excited about Father’s Day, and their chance to show Nathan their amazing homemade gifts.  I haven’t seen what they’ve made, but let me tell you,  it will be hard to beat the laminated, hand drawn “tie” from 2012.

I asked them this morning what the best thing about their dad is.

Liam said, “That he can make anything. He’s a carpenter you know”.  (Yep, I picked that up, thanks.)

Coco said, “How he tickles my feet with his scubble (sic) in the morning, and how he calls me Snickers, but he doesn’t call me Snickers anymore because it makes me want to eat Snickers, so yeah, not so much the Snickers thing, but the scubble thing, that’s funny.”

So there you go Nath, I couldn’t get anything else out of them.  Beards and construction.

I’ve got a few more ideas though, and yes it does look like a list.  This is why I think Nath is the duck’s nuts:

  • That he is honest and fair and trustworthy and loyal and dependable, and his children know that
  • That he is a hands-on Dad, and the kids know that he’s an equal parent
  • That he cooks their dinner, reads them books at bedtime and gives them big, big hugs
  • That he is always available for chats, or games, or mucking around
  • That he knows how to make them laugh
  • That he follows up on his promises, and keeps his word, so they can trust him
  • That he is fiercely protective of them, and they can rely on him to keep them safe
  • That he makes them billy-carts
  • That he plays Sylvanian Families, spots possums and kicks the footy
  • That he knows many, many, really crap kid-jokes
  • That he loves them best
  • That he truly believes that everything will work out in the end, so they catch his calm
  • That he takes them fishing and surfing and camping, and teaches them how to do it for themselves
  • That he dances with them, sings with them, so they love music too
  • That I suspect he really wanted to breast-feed Liam himself, and calls him ‘my little mate’
  • That he cried and cried along with me when we were learning about Coco’s diagnosis way back when
  • That his arms are strong, his soul is open, and his heart is big.

Happy Father’s Day Nath, you rock.

Rock

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Does the Dad in your life rock?

Did you have a happy day today?

..Pop in tomorrow for Father’s Day, yet to come

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Family•Writing

(The Ghost of) Father’s Day Past…

by Alison Asher 4 Comments

This Sunday is Father’s Day.

Some of us have them around to celebrate with; to buy them shonky gifts or, to make even worse ones, or as I used to do; to buy the same old Scorched Almonds from Darrell Lea just to see if: 1. they were surprised, and 2. I had any change left over for some Bo Peep lollies for myself.

And some of us only have the memories.

I’m going to share with you the page I wrote for my Dad’s eulogy.  Sounds a bit melancholy, I know, but I guess if you are playing along with me here, I’d like you to know what an amazing father he was to me.

MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERA

Lessons From the Heart

Some people in the world try to teach others by lecturing or instructing, and some just quietly clear their throat, take a pause, and  gently lead by example…

 

When you brought me home a new book every Friday, no matter what kind of day you’d had, I learnt to value intellect, and to deliver on promises made.

When you quietly sat back and taught me to drive, without yelling even once, I learnt the value of calmness and patience.

When you would put down whatever you were doing, to help me with my homework, I realised the gift of letting children know they are more important than anything else.

When I cheated on your Rubik’s cube to get ten dollars, and you found me out, and just quietly said you were disappointed, I learnt to value of integrity and honour, and never cheated again.

When you took me on the Mad Mouse even though we were both terrified, I learnt to face my fears, and that sometimes we can lean on each other when things get tough.

When I saw all the things that you would quietly do for others, without need for accolades or repayment, I saw how wonderful things come from bringing happiness to the lives of others.

When I saw how you looked at my Mum, and I heard the phone ring for her every day, I learnt what it is to love someone with all your heart.

When I saw you hold our tiny babies, so tenderly and so naturally, I realised how much you sacrificed to be part of our family.

When I saw the joy you had guiding and playing with our children, I saw that unconditional love really does exist.

When I saw your silent suffering and the pain behind your smiles, I understood what true courage is, and how much you loved us, to try and spare us from your agony.

When I saw you take your last breaths, I learnt that the most important thing on this Earth is to live fully and love completely, and then to let go.

Thank you, my wonderful teacher.

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 Happy Father’s Day to you all.

…Pop over tomorrow for Father’s Day, Present

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